How many times will I tread this winding stair..? We have all been dead a long while. Have you any idea of the sheer effort to climb these heights simply to say hello, again? To you, again? I will scale higher and higher to the tune of your indifference, it's known. But no birds sing in this house. Oh sure, it's true, we live in different worlds now. But there was a time our worlds met. Wasn't there, Mum..? Mum? Fucking hell.

I struck myself on the side of the face with the base of my hand, kicked open the door. Everything was here, intact. I slumped into the client chair. Agrippa, Paracelsus, Fludd, my Ouspenski. It was all here, everything. What was I thinking. I hit myself again, the other cheek, breathing deeply, until I heard the soft thud of Gareth's car door. Another day, with relief.