I didn't intend to spend the whole night with Rachel ( more about her later). Suffice to say her flat is so spotless, it fooled me into thinking I was presentable. I left her curled in bed, straightening the duvet as I went. And so I wafted into work, into the kitchen, tranquil as a ghost. Gareth entered, nodding. Sensing my calm, he said exactly what he was thinking. Will you swop rooms with me...? Hitching his neck up, trying to find that difficult, errant zip, possibly one that I too had difficulties with. Will I what..? His voice quivered on the me. Will you swop rooms with...? He instantly regretted the question. What does he think we are, brothers? But I had to give him hope. I chewed on my lips a while, as if imagining the panoramic vista of his window, all my own at last. Hah, there are months of advantage in this. Of course, you're doing a friday group. You must need the space, I said, with empathy. He looked down at his shoes, as if remembering something. I stirred my coffee slowly and, as if remembering some sadness myself said, you know, I always knew you would be good at group work. For a moment, my belly felt a weighty, soulful sense of balance. It seemed possible to refuse Gareth's request with a kind, but straight answer and possibly our working relationship would be the better for this clarity. But no, instead, with a stirring of libido- almost certainly relating to Helen- I said, let's talk later.